I'm going to turn into a rabbit soon.

Long time no post, but life has been busy lately! I don't have much to talk about on the cancer front at the moment since I seem to be surviving the return to work better than I had anticipated.  Things are going ok (shhhhh, they might hear me say that and then all hell will break lose) at the moment.  Energy is holding up, and I'm surprising myself by getting up in the am and making it out the door without rushing too much.  I'm actually getting to school before the kids are on the floor--it's really nice just before 7:25am when there's no one there, my classroom is dark and empty, and it's quiet....by the end of last year I was barely making it to my room by the start of homeroom, and the little buggers would be piled up outside my locked door, positioning themselves to get in first.  So, that's a nice change from last year.

Picture of  hallway, but taken a couple of years ago on the last day for seniors.  I don't have a pic of it empty....

However, I'm surviving on lots of green stuff to battle the weight issue.  I will become a giant rabbit soon.  I'm putting together salads or hummus and veggies for lunch just about every day and figure it will get old soon.  Breakfast is Chobani yogurt with some kind of fruit and a slice of banana or corn bread...I'm waiting for the stress to kick in, and then my meticulously planned diet will explode on itself, and it's every glazed crueller for himself.  I'm hoping that won't happen.  I have managed to lose all of 2 pounds from the summer.   A little walking here and there, but no set schedule.  Same story, different year/week/month/day.  I figure if most of my day consists of plant life, it might cut down on some of the weight staying on my hips.   In the meantime, I'm carefully searching for signs of a cotton tail growing out of my slightly too large ass. 

Saw the movie "The Town" over the weekend.  The movie itself was good--great car chase through the North End--even if it was a little on the violent side.  Sis and I had lots of chuckles as we watched the ice rink where we spent our childhood flash across the screen.  We had fun recognizing the streets and places in the neighborhood, and the accents were finally well done and believable for a Boston movie.  Dark side of life in our little town, and the disclaimer about all the "good people" who clearly out number the bad was shown after the credits finished.  We were the only ones left in the theater, so no one else in that showing saw it.  I always seem to be defending where I came from, and I find myself doing it again with the release of the movie.  It was a great place to grow up, and in some ways I wish things hadn't changed so much.  There was a real sense of community, everyone knew who your grandparents were and frequently threatened us with, "I'll tell your mother."  And they did.  I'm reading the book now.  Ben Affleck did a great job--where will he situate his next film?  He's done Charlestown, Dorchester and Southie....not bad for a guy from the People's Republic of Cambridge.  He probably never set foot in the town when he was younger, right?  It was worth seeing--we'll have to get it when it comes out on DVD and see what else we can identify. 

Right now I'm up late since I had a lovely iced hazelnut from Starbucks at 5pm so I could push through our first Open House tonight.  I had a ton of parents which surprised me since I have all the older kids--didn't expect so many to show up.  Things went fine, but it makes for a really long day.  And now I'm wired.  I spent some time looking for articles and info about the 33 trapped miners in Chile so I can use them in the AP class.

Message for Open House?  I love all my special snowflakes. 

Off to bed now that it's well after midnight.  Tomorrow will seem even longer....especially since I just realized the date, meaning I need to get stuck with a needle tomorrow for my bloodwork check for my appointment on October 4th with my favorite endocrinologist.  Sigh.  That means I will start ruminating on whether or not I'll hear the word "undetectable" next week.  Time to check in with St. Peregrine for a little chat. 



Makes me think of "Miami Vice"....

Brought to you as part of Thyroid Awareness Month!

This comes from Thyca.org via their Facebook update...now I understand what the colors mean.  Who knew that teal was a "healing color"?

The Story of the Thyroid Cancer Colors

Why do we represent thyroid cancer with three colors? The Awareness Ribbon Pins, Magnet Ribbons, and ThyCa graphic all display the three colors: deep blue/purple, pink, and teal.

The 3 colors were selected nearly 12 years ago by thyroid cancer survivor.

Cherie LC, a ThyCa volunteer. The deep blue/purple represents the throat energy center, pink represents spiritual influences in healing, and teal is a healing color.

The 3-color combination also emphasizes the variety of situations with thyroid cancer, because there are different types of thyroid cancer. Also, thyroid cancer affects people of all ages, from young children through seniors.

September is Thyroid Cancer Awareness Month, and this month and throughout the year we can all wear our colors proudly. Thank you very much for raising awareness.

But seriously--look at this image I found on Google, and note the colors.  How can you not associate the ribbon with this horrible 80s memory? LMAO.  

Weekend!

Ahhhhh, weekend.

This had to be the longest week I can remember.  The first week back to school is strange--exciting because of all the new faces and the idea of a fresh start, but exhausting due to being on my feet all day in shoes for the first time in a couple of months.  By Wednesday the kids looked like they needed mid-day naps and the teachers looked shell-shocked!  It's pretty comical.

My classes seem to be ok.  The AP kids are also shell-shocked by the fact that I'm only speaking Spanish (any other language wouldn't work), so I'm going to have to spend a lot of time convincing them that they'll survive.

As for the weekend, Mr. Wonderful and I took a trip to see a car show near Bennington, VT.  Oh the people watching! It's an odd combination of men in khaki shorts and loafers who can afford to restore antique cars, and people who look like they came off the mountain for day of scrounging old car parts at the flea market, and then people of all sizes and shapes in between.  Some of the cars are beautiful.  We meandered our way back home via back roads and stopped in to see my Mother-in-law for a visit before the final leg home.  Once we got home, we realized that Mr. W's car was still at work--we forgot that I picked him up yesterday with my car en route to VT.  Sigh.

Sunday was kind of blah...plans were to originally go to the Irish Cultural Center's festival, but Mr. Wonderful wasn't feeling too well, so we stayed put while he napped.  I did laundry, ironed, made 2 loaves of banana bread and prepped for this week at school.  He was not a happy camper between back pain and the onset of a cold.

And the Patriots lost.

So, 50-50 split this weekend.

Not feeling as "destrozada" as I thought I would be after the first full week of classes. I was pretty energetic yesterday, and stayed up til after 11pm so I could finish "The Duchess".  It was a very thorough biography of Georgiana Spencer Cavendish, the Duchess of Devonshire.  I saw the movie a couple of years ago and now need to go see it again.  She was an amazing woman for her time, and there are some eerie parallels between her life and the life of her descendent, Diana Spencer.  Not that I'm big into British history, but I picked this up at a used bookstore and it was in the "to read" pile.

Portrait of Georgiana done by Thomas Gainsborough

The movie Duchess played by Keira Knightly.

"The Town" is next on the pile since it's all over the place.  Dying to read about my hometown and see just how negative the stereotypes are....

¡Es mi cumple!

Today is September 11th, and I turned 42 at 3:17pm.
Funny, but I don't feel like I'm that old.
I'm no longer sure of how to take the good wishes that say, "Hope you have a great year!", or "Hope this year is wonderful!" and all those sorts of comments.
People said them last year, and look at what happened.

So I spent the morning sleeping in.  Mr. Wonderful had to work. And I did some laundry.   And cleaned up a little.  Sis came around 4, and Sis-in-law came just before 5 so we could all trek across the city to my favorite tapas restaurant where we munched on yummy tapas washed down with two jarras of sangria.  Needless to say I didn't drive home.

Sis made a divine cake-from-scratch with raspberry filling and buttercream frosting.  So good that mere words can't describe the deliciousness of it all.  It was that good.

Best presents:  facial and massage from Sis (ooh!) and an iTunes card, and a night in October to have dinner and go see "Wicked".  Yay! I also got the soundtrack so I can learn all the songs before we go.  Sis-in-law also gave me two pairs of great dangly earrings that will go with lots of stuff and a really cool teeny bowl to put them in.  Mr. Wonderful gave me a great card about shoes and then told me I can go pick out some jewelry.  How far should I go on that offer?

Thoughts and prayers too for all those lost on 9/11/01.....

StandUp2Cancer

The following is from the Stand Up To Cancer website:

We used to have such crazy dreams.
The kind of dreams that brought us together, made us not mere mortals, but a movement.

We used to dream we’d get to the moon.
And we were crazy enough, fanatical enough, relentless enough, to get there.

We dreamed we’d split the atom.
Make smallpox and polio whispers from forgotten history books.
Make technology infinite, individual.
Connect the world.

All the unbelievable and the impossible,
all the can’t do and the never will, we overwhelmed them, we overpowered them, we conquered them.
They said no and we, well,
We said yes.
We stood up.
We stood up and changed the world.

Stand up when everybody else sits down
Stand up when it’s easier to turn away
Stand up for everyone who can’t rise anymore

When the answer seems impossible, stand up
When the dream is right within our reach, stand up
When the powerful refuse your call, stand up

The moment is now and the time has come to stand up.
One out of every two men
One out of every three women
will face these diseases we call cancer.

Our sisters, our brothers, our fathers, our mothers,
our husbands, our wives, our children.
Our very best friends and those we’ve yet to meet.

One person every minute, one person in a moment gets lost, gets stolen, gets taken away.

We are a tapestry of lives touched and brought together by a terrorist we can actually find. And in the time it’s taken to read this, three more Americans have died.

Unforgivable.

This is where the end of cancer begins.

When together we become a force unmistakable.
A movement undeniable.
A light that cannot dim.

When we take our wild impossible dreams
And make them possible
Make them true

When together we rise as one
When we stand up
When we Stand Up To Cancer.

Something to think about as I'm watching the telethon that is on every tv channel tonight.  The opening hit home, and I like the survivor t-shirts!  Scary and inspiring to see how many people are wearing survivor tees.  

1 day down, 184 to go

Back to work today with kids....and I'm still standing!  Maybe being hyperactive will be a bonus?

Everyone came back today, and a lot of my kids from last year came by my room to ask how I was feeling and how my summer was--it was so sweet.

The day was a little chaotic but normal.  I don't want to take this as a bad omen, but a massive thunder storm exploded just as the kids were coming in the building--some were completely drenched.  Loud thunder, black skies and vivid lightning just as we're getting started?  The storm passed, it got muggy and the building felt like it was sopping wet.  I haven't gotten home before 6pm and hope that evens out a bit more in the next few weeks.  I'm sore from being on my feet all days for the last two days, which doesn't sound like much, but after a summer of being a giant vegetable, there's some pain there!  So why not push it more and go for a walk?   I did manage to get out for a walk with Mr. Wonderful when I got home.  I think I've gone walking 3 out of the last 5 days.  It's a start.

Two classes are at capacity with 31, and the others seem pretty small to me with 23, 25 and 27.  Homeroom has 30, studies have 32.  I'll figure out all their names by, oh, March maybe? I hate to admit that I can't even remember the names of the kids I said goodbye to two months ago.  I can blame that on the thyroid, right?

I'm thinking the iced small hazelnut Starbucks coffee might have something to do with getting through this week.

Off to bed, hoping I can keep getting up on time--two consecutive days so far of getting to school early!
Mr. Wonderful bets I can't keep it up, and past precedent will probably prove him right.  Again, maybe the hyperness will hlep!

Eek--forgot to take my calcium and vitamin with dinner....

Happy New Year!

The Tuesday after Labor Day has become my "Happy New Year!" holiday--first official day back to school.  Kids report the next day.

I have to go back tomorrow.  Back to a daily schedule where I have to drag myself out of bed by 6 am, 6:15 if I really want to push the envelope, to get to school on time.  Or close to on time where I might have a few minutes to hang up my coat and empty my bag before I have a student in my face.  If I don't, I have 10 minutes of administrivia in homeroom before I have to jump into my first class, which starts just before 8 am.  Good God help me.  I have a senior homeroom this year.

I'm not complaining, just trying to mentally get myself ready to go back.  I love my job most days, and this is Year #21 of my career.  I spent two days, from 10 am until 6pm, cleaning and unpacking my stuff. And I'm so sore from moving stuff, including pushing the massive desk to the back of the room.  

My new home, room 131.  All clean and sparkly.  

View from my desk. Note the time, and it's not am.  I still have to clean the boards and wash all the tables down.  

Here are the 500 Greek textbooks I had to empty out of the closet before I could tackle my own stuff. 

Since I had to move my classroom at the end of last year, it took me more time to set up for this year since my entire academic life was in boxes piled at the back of the room.  The previous occupant of the room retired over the summer, but left all the textbooks she used in the closet.  It's the only closet in the room, so of course I had to empty it out if I wanted a place to hang my coat or store stuff.  I think teaching is the strangest profession sometimes--in an attempt to "send a message" to the administration, people do things that they think will piss off the higher ups.  However, all they do is piss off their supposed colleagues because who got stuck cleaning a really gross room?  Who got stuck unloading 300 books on Plato and 200 books on Greek reading and grammar?  Who got stuck with a broken chair and a really grimy desk with a lovely carving of a penis and testicles in the top drawer?  ME, that's who.  Do you really think any administrators notice?  Probably not. 

 I want to know how someone had enough time to carve an anatomically correct penis and testicles in a metal drawer and not be noticed.  They aren't the "best and the brightest" for nothing.  

Ok, let me put my soap box back in the closet now that there's room since Plato moved out.  

My new real estate is actually nice since for the first time in 6 years, I'll be neighbors with teachers who also teach Spanish and I can even eat lunch with them!  We can actually talk to each other about what we're doing.  We were scattered all over the building before and it was hard to get together.  Only downer is that there are no white boards, just black chalk boards.  I have tons of colored chalk to keep it messy and interesting.  One major plus is that, also for the first time in 6 years, I have a place to lock things up!  No more hiding things under furniture or lugging it all with me.  I have an actual key to the closet, and it works!  The file cabinet has a key that turns, but the lock doesn't work.  So sad that I'm excited by the prospect of having at least one place to lock things, but I guess it's the small things in life we often overlook.  Either that, or people in other professions don't have to put up with this bullshit.  

I've gotten most of my paper stuff organized, but will probably have to go to Staples to copy it.  Tomorrow there will be lines and tension at all the copiers, assuming they are working.  I have a vague memory of last year when there was only one functioning  copier in the entire building during opening week.  If you want to see stress, jump in the line of teachers waiting to copy what they need for the first day of class.  It can be downright vicious, and God help the newbie who doesn't know the pecking order.  Good times, good times.  

What's up with that, St. Peregrine??

Sadness today....cancer claimed another great person yesterday morning.  How do I explain this family connection?  George is the husband to my mom's first cousin Carol.  Their mothers were sisters. Carol, George and their daughters Jeannie and Jill have always had a presence in our lives.  George passed away early this morning after battling a brain tumor for most of 2010.  Funny, caring always ready to throw a smile in your direction, I used to love when Carol and George would make their quick blitz runs home to the north from Texas, and we'd get to spend a few semi-rushed hours chatting and catching up with them.  They came north for both happy and sad occasions, and it was great to have them at my wedding and at both my parents' funerals.  I know the past months have been really hard on their family, but update emails said George kept a positive outlook despite a grim outlook.

Here's one of my favorite George stories:  after my dad passed away in 1999, mom decided that we needed to get away for a few days, so we flew down to Houston.  Sis and I had never been to Texas, so it was a new adventure and a distraction from dad's death and funeral.  We flew Southwest and had a bazillion stops, so I was a little zonked by the time we reached our final destination.  We were all set to drive off in our rental car, and for some reason mom didn't like it and wanted to change it.  We swapped cars and made the 45 minute trip to Carol and George's house on the other side of Houston.   Once we got there and settled in, I realized that I had left a bag in the first rental car.  And, in the bag was another bag, full of pictures of my dad.  I don't know why I brought them with me, but I did.  I was heartbroken and so pissed at myself for being so stupid, leaving something so important in the car.  George very calmly grabbed his keys and told me he'd drive me back to the airport to get the bag.  So he did.  And the bag was still there, with the pictures inside.  Did I mention that we also hit rush hour traffic, so the trip took way more than 90 minutes round trip?  He kept telling me it was no big deal and to not get upset.  I felt awful that I had eaten up so much time in the quest to get the bag, because we were only there for a couple of days, and George kept reassuring me that it was no big deal as long as I got the pictures back.

I also remember the last trip that I saw Carol and George when they came up to New England after mom's stroke, and we spent the afternoon eating, talking and eating some more at the Continental on route 1.  Definitely put a smile into our day.

Prayers and thoughts are in Texas, and I'm hoping in some way St. Peregrine is watching over the family.

Waiting for Earl

There's a hurricane named Earl a'comin' to New England, and the media blitz is in full force!  Out of the last 49 minutes I've had the local news on, 47 minutes of them have focused on Earl even though no one can accurately predict where he's going.  He's expected to pass 25-75 miles off of Nantucket, so maybe we'll just get high winds and tons of rain.  We need the rain.

Mr. Earl, thanks to NASA. 

The Cape and Islands are busy boarding up, and even the national news is reporting from Chatham.  Waves are expected to be 20 feet near the Cape, and are measuring 40 feet near the eye.  Not sure how close he'll come to us, but we have supplies.  Mr. Wonderful will probably have to work the weekend.  

Gotta love weather in New England.  

UPDATE 10pm on Friday night:  Well, it's raining.  Earl must have gotten tired on his long trip up the coast, and I think he's lost his hurricane status.  Been downgraded to a tropical storm.  It sure feels tropical, and the humidity is brutal.  They say the heaviest rain and wind will during the overnight hours. We're in a giant fog bank and can't even see the city.  I think last week's nor'easter was worse.  Again, gotta love New England. 

And I'm telling you....

...everything you need to know about thyroid cancer, and probably a few things you never knew!  Oh, that, and I'm not going.

Since this is Thyroid Cancer Awareness Month, I figured I'd do some searching on the web to see what was being said about it.  September is a pretty big month for me--new school year, birthday, start of my favorite season....so it seems fitting to have the same month dedicated to the thing that has turned my life upside down!

My pin up girl....go to DearThyroid.org for why!  

The website DearThyroid.org is a great place, full of info, comfort, humor and a space to let it all hang out in whatever way works for you.  It is a huge help to read what others have experienced, and if there is some humor in there, even better.  One of the most important things that has helped me deal with this is the blogosphere.  I've learned sooooo much from other people going through this hell.  DearThyroid is sponsoring a blogging carnival where people post their ideas/feelings about awareness, so I thought I'd participate and see what comes of it.  They have some questions they want answered....

First off, I was diagnosed in February 2010 with papillary thyroid cancer with classic, follicular and diffuse sclerosing variants. The original tumor was small, about 1cm, but it had already made it to my lymph nodes by the time it was discovered.  I had a TT in March followed by a month of intense hypo hell, and RAI at the end of May.  Prior to the thyca diagnosis, I had been waging a 12 year war with Hashimotos and a malfunctioning underactive thyroid that resulted in miserable infertility.   We weren't on good terms before the diagnosis, and it only went downhill from there.  Not sorry to see the gland go frankly.  As of now, bloodwork is coming back undetectable.  Woo hoo!

Question 1:  How has your disease changed your view of awareness?  
I think having thyca has made me want to talk about it, to let people know what the reality is.  I have also spent time undoing myths about thyca.  I hate hearing, "Oh, if you have to have cancer, that's the best kind to have." Really?  I don't have to have cancer, and I don't want to have any kind of cancer.  I want to ask the person which cancer they would choose if they had to have cancer.  What a stupid statement.
 And, "My aunt/sister/mother-in-law/ best friend's second cousin twice removed had thyroid cancer, and she's fine."  I wonder if the person really understood what this new world entails?  That thyca survivor probably never was "fine" since she had to be followed constantly with bloodwork, scans, possibly more radioactive iodine, and probably spent tons of time regulating her TSH.  Redefine the word fine please.
I now feel some sort of responsibility to educate people a little bit.  Thyca is not easy.  It is not something that ever really goes away.  30% chance of recurrence isn't something to snicker at.

Question 2:  Do you feel that raising awareness is important?  
Hell yes.  If thyca is on the rise, chances are you're going know someone who is diagnosed with it. And, look at what the pink ribbon has done for breast cancer--everyone seems to recognize what that represents.

Question 3:  Do you feel the need to educate others about the disease?
Yes, if for no other reason than to provide accurate information and dispel myths.  Thyca is by no means "easy".  Is there any such thing as a "good cancer"?
Thyca also leaves you with a host of things that are just annoying:  memory loss, brain fog, weight gain, extremes of being exhausted and hyper.... I don't think people understand how a disease like this shatters your foundations because it leaves you unable to trust--unable to trust your body, unable to trust the future you had planned, unable to trust that everything really will work out fine.  There is always the nagging possibility that it might not.  It can mess up your previously happy view of the cosmos and how you thought your life was going to be.  More unpredictability than I want to deal with some days!
Also, aside from the scar, I look fine physically.   Fatter and a little more puffy at times, but relatively normal. The outside package may be holding up, but there are days that I figure the innards are in total chaos, and no one can tell that by looking at me.
So if I can explain some of this, then maybe the "good cancer" image will go away.

Question 4:  How do you go about it (promoting awareness)?  
I'm still working on that one.  My close friends and family and most of my co-workers know about it since I'm pretty open talking about it.  I put a Thyca link on my Facebook page today and mentioned in my status that I'm a thyroid cancer survivor.
This blog has been a great outlet for me, but I also figure that if someone stumbles across it during a google search, and some if the info on it is helpful, then I've helped/educated someone else.

 I have a silver bracelet with butterflies on it to represent my missing thyroid (although I don't personally miss the damn thing after all the havoc it caused), and I now have butterfly decorations in my classroom.  People will ask me why butterflies, and it's a perfect opening to talk about  thyca.
Ok, the classroom butterflies tie in with a movie I show in class (In the Time of the Butterflies--great movie), but it seems eerie to me that I plastered my room with these beautiful removable sticker butterflies, only  to be diagnosed later in the year.  They've taken on a whole new meaning!
And of course, there's the scar across my neck.  I refuse to hide it and consider it a battle scar in this never-ending war.
Thyca.org has some great tips and suggestions to promote awareness too--I'm thinking I might print out some of their flyers and hang them up in the teacher's room at school.
I've never been one to mince words. so why start now?

I also think that by helping make people more aware, I'm paying back for the people who helped educate me, kind of paying it all forward.  I love September.....

Check your neck!

September is Thyroid Cancer Awareness month!!

I never knew that until now for obvious reasons, and because thyroid cancer doesn't have the media machine and presence of other cancers.  The person who came up with the pink ribbon for breast cancer awareness was a genius--unfortunately, that pink ribbon is everywhere.

I'd love to know who designed the rather uniquely strange color combo for thyroid cancer--it's teal, pink and blue or purple depending on which website you consult.  How Miami Vice-ish.  Some sites say it's only purple, but I think colon cancer took the just purple ribbon.

The website for ThyCa is phenomenal if you are looking for anything and everything related to thryoid cancer.  Go to www.thyca.org for basic info, resources and coping ideas. They also have the life-saving LID cookbook in pdf format for free that you can print out--I think a new edition came out a few weeks ago.  I would have been lost without it during my month on the low iodine diet.

www.thyca.org

As for the "Check your neck" motto, it didn't work for me to check it since I only felt a globulous lumpy mush of a thyroid.  Dr. N checked it every time I saw her, much to my dismay since the last couple of check ups resulted in my trying really hard not to throw up from the pressure.  Imagine where I'd be if she didn't check it?

Still undetectable!  However, I think I have gained 5 pounds since the last bloodwork.  Even though I have historically felt great in the hyper zone, my body would get confused and show hypo symptoms.  So far the extra weight and drier skin are the only hypo symptoms.  The rest of my metabolism feels like it sped up, and someone told me the other day that my rate of speech was much faster.  Interesting.